"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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