I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
