There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
time to smoke my breakfast
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
