they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
