They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
