Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I lost the right to judge tonight
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
