Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
