lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
