i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize