Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
