I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
