Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
