Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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