I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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