You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
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