no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Randomize
