dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
