Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I came so hard my ears popped.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
