I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
