Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
