I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
