her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
