I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
