Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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