jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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