I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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