A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I wish i was in the wii world.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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