Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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