i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Randomize