Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
