Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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