I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Randomize
