It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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