i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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