she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
