It's like a parade of train wrecks.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
