he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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