OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize