Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Success! We fucked roommates!
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize