Christians are straight up FREAKS
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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