I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
