the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
