i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
