I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
