he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
