You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Randomize
