On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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