so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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