You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
