I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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